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Songs: Fire Drill

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Fire Drill! There are too many
How many were real fires? Not any
If there was a real fire we'd get killed
Because we'd all assume it was another bloody drill

Fire Drill! In all my life
I must have done a fire drill a thousand times
In every single one of them the biggest joke
Is that the only fire you see is people having a smoke

Fire Drill! It's cold outside
But the gilet wearing wardens are all wrapped up tight
I challenge their authority I decline
To join my whole department in a single file line

Fire Drill! It's a scam
To reinforce obedience to The Man
We are Pavlov's Personnel
Trained to use the stairs whenever we hear a bell

Fire Drill! Before you go
Finish what you're doing and collect your coat
It isn't an emergency, so take the lift
The fire safety officer is taking the piss

Fire Drill! There are too many
How many were real fires? Not any
If there was a real fire we'd get killed
Because we'd all assume it was another bloody drill


Published by Wipe Out Music Publishing

This song was written during a fire drill (obviously) as I stomped around the block furiously thinking "This is the third one we've had this year and it isn't even Easter yet". Rather than grind my teeth and look angrily askance at security guards I thought I would channel my righteous fury into a song. So I did!


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