Songs: Device Detection For Everyone

notes / gigs / releases

I got all excited 'cos
I'd bought a new machine
It's an Android ipad laptop tablet
Kindle with touchscreen
I set off for the internet
Where disappointment lurked:
Every page I went to
Something didn't work

Page displays of tons of text
At micoscopic size
Buttons that you cannot click
And sliders you can't slide

And I thought Wouldn't it be nice
If they knew what kind of device
Us users was using
So their software could be choosing
Control Options that work right

It's not like in the rest of life
It's all that hard to do
No-one has an issue
With a diverse size of shoe
A well provisioned toolbox
Has a variety of tools
We've different pills for different ills
And several kinds of food

And now we're living in the future
We shouldn't have to squint
At screens you cannot see unless
You've zoomed and scrolled and pinched

Wouldn't it be nice
If they knew what kind of device
Us users was using
So their software could be choosing
Screen definition that work right

I've given up on pages that I cannot flipping see
My laptop's waited ages for sites that only use touchscreen
All the people of the world cry out "Surely it is time!"
"For device detection for everyone, and adaptive web design!"

Wouldn't it be nice
If they knew what kind of device
Us users was using
So their software could be choosing
Screen definition that work right
Control Options that work right
An internet of things
Where everything works right

Published by Wipe Out Music Publishing

Back in February 2013 I was contacted by someone asking if I'd write a song to promoter a kickstarter campaign to develop device detection software. I had a bit of time spare and the person asking was a nice chap, so I had a go and came up with this. I had to do a LOT OF* (*some) research* (*looking at wikipedia) to work out what on earth it was all about, and eventually came up with this. I recorded two demo versions, as he thought the first one was a bit fast, and waited to see what happened. As far as I know, nothing ever did!