Songs: Fire Drill

notes / gigs / releases

Fire drill
There are too many
How many are real fires? Not any
If there was a real fire we'd get killed
Because we'd all assume it was another bloody drill
And it's a fire drill

In all my life
I must have done a fire drill a thousand times
In every single one of them the biggest joke is
The only fire you see is someone having a smoke
In a fire drill

It's cold outside
The gilet wearing wardens are all wrapped up tight
I challenge their authority - I decline
To join my whole department in a single file line
In a fire drill

Fire drill
It's a scam
To reinforce obedience to The Man
We are Pavlov's Personnel
Trained to use the stairs whenever we hear a bell
In a fire drill

Before I go
I'll finish what I'm doing and collect my coat
It isn't an emergency, I'm taking the lift
The fire safety officer is taking the mick
In a fire drill

Fire drill
There are too many
How many are real fires? Not any
If there was a real fire we'd get killed
Because we'd all assume it was another bloody drill
And it's a fire drill

Published by Wipe Out Music Publishing



This song was written during a fire drill (obviously) as I stomped around the block furiously thinking "This is the third one we've had this year and it isn't even Easter yet". Rather than grind my teeth and look angrily askance at security guards I thought I would channel my righteous fury into a song. So I did!

Not long after that Lockdown happened, and there were no fire drills. I started to wonder if I'd been unfair, until the second day when I was back in the office... and there was a fire drill!